The world is way too big right now and the month of December is entirely too short. Life is absolutely careening, my immune system issues are in yuck-ish stasis, and I find myself less and less equipped at dealing with the shebang. So this week- ha ha- I haven’t!
Please enjoy my 5 random December thoughts- this week (so far):
5) You know how people are always talking about finding joy, holding joy, and other verb-y ways of keeping joy in your hands? I’ve decided that my method- at least for this season of life- is “batting.” Yep, I’m not grasping the joy so much as I’m batting at it like a confused and excitable cat. Sometimes I even catch corners of the joy on my fingernails and, oh boy, in those moments? I am experiencing the holiday season in all of its glory, darn it.
I’m pretty sure that’s what they call Being Full of the Season.
4) One way I’ve recently batted joy is to drag my entire family downtown to the Christkindlmarket on a school night- on a Monday school night at that- to beat the crowds to the glass animal booth at the German village. During this hurryupandhavefun endeavor, we also squeezed in a visit to Santa’s at Macy’s. Because nothing says Memorable Experience like a surprise visit to a department store where- pleasedon’ttouchanything– we have to hurry to get back to the hot chocolate booth before- noit’swaytoohottodrink– hopping back in the car- pleasedon’tspillitIjustcleanedthatcoat– because it’s a school night. Our prizes? Photographic evidence of three beaming kids with Santa, and four impossibly tiny glass animals that the vendors have decided to- and don’t think I haven’t noticed- raise the price on each year.
Worth it. Obviously. LOOK AT THEIR PERFECT FACES.
3) This has very little to do with Christmas or even December, but I’m inspired by women who wear leggings as pants. Usually, this fashion choice enrages me, as I generally don’t like seeing the lace pattern on anyone’s underwear, nor the jiggly bits that aren’t in “camo mode” behind that poly blend. But lately, I can’t help but admire the choice. I fall into the category of complete derailment if so much as my ankle sock slips under my heel inside my boot and it’ll absolutely cause me to limp and wonder if my limp is causing a scene for the better part of the day. So to a) know that elastic is digging into parts not usually seen in the light of day and b) that knowledge elicits an aura of I LOOK DAMN GOOD, DAMMIT…it’s something to work towards. Maybe.
2) A friend recently told me about something she had read; this idea that we only have our children to ourselves for eighteen summers. That’s rough on a Mama’s heart. Eighteen short summers? But here’s what’s worse, in my overly sentimental, currently steroided heart: we have an even tinier number of Christmas seasons with true Santa Believers. (And then x minus the age difference of your younger kids since, as everyone knows, once the oldest kid knows something, EVERYBODY knows something.) That’s hard. And I know, I know, Christmas with bigger kids is fun, too, and someday I’ll shower in peace yadda yadda…but, truth be told, I welcome the chaotic and generally overwhelming nature of December if only for the moments of actual, beautiful innocence with my kids. Any stray jingle bell OBVIOUSLY came from a reindeer harness. A man with a long white beard? PROBABLY SANTA GETTING A SANDWICH ON HIS LUNCH BREAK. Sparkly snow does carry wishes around to the angels, writing a lengthy wish list and ending it with all sorts of manners pretty much guarantees all of those items under the tree, and so on.
So maybe I’m not pre-grieving the end of Santa so much as I’m staving off the swap of magic for reality.
1) Speaking of! Have you seen the mashup of Hamilton and Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer? The way-too-suited-to-my-sense-of-humor group, Eclipse 6, created this ditty just for me.
You cannot convince me otherwise, not today.
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