An Open Letter To My As-Yet Unborn Baby… (Whom My Mother Thinks We’ve Found Out The Gender Of…) (But No, We’re Still Waiting To Be Surprised…) (Even Though I Kinda Think You’re A Little Girl…) (But Look How Accurate My Psychic Prowess Turned Out During The Last Pregnancy…) (When We Had Your Sister- A Girl. And Not A Boy.) (I Really Hafta Learn To Condense Before I’m In Charge Of Your Baby Book.) Hi, little baby. You’re 13 ounces humongo {Read More}
And Another Thing…
March 31, 2011 By 4 Comments
Spinning some Slayer. Tomorrow is April Fool’s Day. And I am not playing any tricks, nor am I currently accepting applications for tricks to be played upon me. In fact, heads will roll. Real ones. (Not pretend, April-Foolery ones.) Last year I convinced my family that, while caring for a five month-old, I was ecstatic to announce a new pregnancy. (Ha HAH!) And, if you’ll recall, my sister Em- having not the TIME to read down to the bottom of the {Read More}
Nora gets on her wee little soapbox.
March 17, 2011 By 14 Comments
The wha-? Okay, we all have an announcement to make over here- there’s gonna be another little[r] Schoeny. We’re having a baby! In early October, as a matter of fact. (And considering that I’m the only member of this family without a birthday in the month of October, I’m either really special or just a specific type of carrier. Because- without getting too detailed- this was not the planned month. Guess we weren’t in charge of this one.) But I gotta say, on {Read More}
January must be Customer Service Month.
January 17, 2011 By 2 Comments
It was a good, albeit frigid, weekend here. We actually saw more people than we do for some combined weeks. We went with one pal to an awesome creperie up the street from here- I highly recommend it. Nora also gave it two miniature thumbs way up- but they’re covered in cheese, so I wouldn’t shake her hand or anything. There was a bit of a language barrier, so my Moroccan chai latte actually came as a fresh mint infusion- but {Read More}
Y2k10! That seems more like a ‘captcha’ than a ‘year.’
December 31, 2009 By 6 Comments
In honor of the impending new year- and in consideration of the wee babe in an aquarium bouncer by my knee- I shall jam out a brief review of the year that was ’09: January- We failed to buy a house. This was sad. I began taking Pilates lessons to combat the “extra ten pounds”- ha HA. (I would KILL for an extra ten pounds right now. Well, not exactly. Rather, I’d kill to only have ten pounds to lose. {Read More}
One. Week. Left. (What pressure?)
October 22, 2009 By 13 Comments
To Whom It May Concern; It has recently come to my attention that the master bathroom shower vent has fallen to the floor. Due to its previous placement (above the aforementioned shower), newer problems have shown themselves in the form of gaping ceiling holes (okay, only one, but I’ve seen enough X-Files episodes to know how this can end) and frequent bursts of really warm air that, with the addition of a warmer water temperature, can turn into really, really {Read More}
Are they trying to intimidate me?
October 1, 2009 By 10 Comments
Well, I needn’t have been worried. With the end of Great Expectations (the class, not the book- I finished that in ’96) I feared that my baby saga would no longer be funny- or, worse yet, no longer bring up relevant and timely pregnancy ads on my sidebar. (Have you noticed them? I get maybe an eighth of a cent every time you use one. Click click, people!) As it turns out, being pregnant is still SO MUCH FUN that {Read More}
Just like a feral cat!
September 24, 2009 By 6 Comments
Firstly, let me terrify everyone who may be having a child within the next nine months… Have you read about the woman who got pregnant WHILST pregnant? http://gmy.news.yahoo.com/For serious, this is a bit much. One woman, pregnant- twice- within three weeks. PUT HER HUSBAND IN ANOTHER ROOM, PLEASE! No matter how “rare” the doctors say this may be, *one* case within earshot of my pregnancy is entirely one too many. Pretty much the only perk of the first trimester is {Read More}
